Carol -- Week 4

On pg. 51 Elisabeth stated:  "I must not give way to depressing and sinful sorrow.  I must make my actual life better and more fruitful for God and for the souls who have been entrusted to me."  The souls entrusted to me (my kids) have a way of causing depression and sorrow.  The more you help, the more they demand.  At what point does doing the will of God end and being taken advantage of start?  I pray on this often.  On pg. 52 she states:  "With Him and by Him I must become more tender, strong, and peaceful, to live more in the soul and yet give myself more to those I love and to all whom Providence has put or will put in my way."  I believe that I do this already, but I believe my kids wear steel cleets as they walk all over me.  When they get angry with me, they throw how great a christian I am not.  On this same page she continues:  "To expect nothing from those whom I will try to benefit...........; to accept in silence the disappointments, the misunderstandings, and even the scorn that always come to those in whose depths others discern--and think they can attack--God."  I have lots of work to do to follow in her footsteps.  I am not a silent person.  I think she sums it all up with:  "To pray, to act, to work, to love."

On this same page she state:  "To give myself to everyone in charity, but not to let everyone enter into my heart, which I must not open too lightly.  To welcome an affection only when I have solidly proved its value, and yet to have kindness for all."  I'm a little confused on this aspect.  How does one give to everyone in charity but not let them enter your heart?

On pg. 53 she states:  "I believe, I adore, I hope."  I have no comment except that this sort of sums it all up.
Also on this page she mentions external distractions and agitations which aggravates pain and how she will defend her home and self from all who are unworthy.

On pg. 54 she says:  "this earth is not Heaven".  Heaven in my eyes is peaceful, calm, beautiful, etc.  Just where I hope to end up!!!  She also says:  "May He do a little good through me!"  I hope that is what happens when I help out the crazy lady up the street, or when I volunteer to be a hall monitor during Religion classes, etc.

On pg 55:  "anxious to sacrifice all for Him and for the good of those I love most of all."  "a new resolution to be more brave, to establish myself in peace, and to submit to these offenses without revealing the suffering they cause me."  "My weakness is great"  I couldn't have said it better!  On pg 56 she quotes St Paul:  "I can do all things in Him who strengthens me."  Such a great line!  She continues with:  "My God, assist her ..... to make Thee known and loved."  I try to live my life as though God is shining through me, without preaching,  as this turns everyone off if I even make a comment regarding God.  She also states on that page:  "may at least one heart know and love Jesus Christ through me."  Sums it all up.

On pg 57:  "I have even spoken too much of Thee, my God, for it is true that in this world that does not know Thee, one should weigh well one's words concerning Thee."  I find it amazing that even 100 years ago conversations about God were censored.

On pg 62 Elisabeth wrote:  "to let my Communions, prayers, and meditations be known as little as possible, that I may remain humble, and so that I may not provoke the spirit of obstinacy and ignorance with which I am surrounded."  Boy does this sound like my family.  I pray for my children to return to Church.  For instance,  I take my grandchildren to religion classes and to Mass on Sundays, but when my daughter has to attend a First Communion meeting, the kids are all of a sudden worse than ever and she is unable to get ready.  Because I monitor the hallways during the classes, I am unable to go back and bring her to Church.  I leave everything in God's hands, and know that as long as I pray for her, in His time He will change her heart.  I could go on forever with something about each child, but I won't.  Again, I leave everything in God's hands and in His time frame.  I believe we must live Christlike and teach without words.  ""Let him see God without hearing His name."  {pg.70}.

A few of the resolutions that really stood out to me are:
To neglect not even the smallest duty. {pg 76}
Each day to work first for God and then for my neighbor. {pg 79}
To maintain always exterior calm and evenness of temper.{pg 79}
To put into all my words, acts, and gestures even, a moderation, a peaceful gentleness, which will be a constant sign of my interior serenity. {pg 79}